Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
