Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
