Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
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