Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
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