guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
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I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
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Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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