I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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