absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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