I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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