Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize