You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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