Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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