her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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