Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
my liver is dry heaving
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize