your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
