i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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