I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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