Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize