She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
