Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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