im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I'm jealous of your bromance
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
