she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
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The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
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Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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