I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
