So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize