I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Randomize