I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
