I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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