he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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