M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize