I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
