the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
