and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
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