CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize