is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
