No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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