So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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