Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
