so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
