Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
