She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
