This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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