i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
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