Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize