Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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