69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
