So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
it glows. i had to have it.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Randomize
