Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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