Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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