Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
