just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
COCAINE IS GR8
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