I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
